THE WORLD SERIES

So, the Red Sox won the World Series. I am sure that Red Sox fans are feeling great, and feeling like their win is vindicating the non-Evil Empire little guys. I have terrible news for them. With a huge payroll, an East Coast media bias, and an insufferable fan base, the Red Sox have become *gasp* the Yankees to the rest of us.

I know that hurts to hear, but the Red Sox seem no less an Evil Empire than the Yankees. In fact, the Yankees are in disarray, and A-Rod just opted out of his contract. Suddenly the Yankees seem like underdogs compared to be evil Red Sox Nation.

ADIOS OCTOBER

October sucked. I can't wait for it to be over. I think U had a different sickness every week. Actually this weekend nicely encapsulates our month.

So, U had a stomach virus this week. Lots of vomit. Good stuff. On Thursday L got some "symptoms" of the illness. Friday, right as I was wrapping up a meeting to head home it became clear to me that I had also contracted U's illness. I apologize to the person at Walgreens who has to hose out the parking lot on Saturday morning. It happens. I was sick. Anyway, L and I spent all weekend having "intestinal distress" and trying to keep up with the now healthy U. Joy.

Then, on Sunday, as I think I am recovering, Brian "Rex Grossman" Griese actually got me to watch some "Kimora: Life in the Fab Lane." Think about that. The Bears were so bad that I watched a reality show about one of the guys from Run DMC's ex-wife.

And back to work on Monday.

AS FUNNY AS IT GETS

Boondocks is back with a new season. I am generally in bed too early now to get to watch them, but some kind people have strung the episodes together on youtube. Season two rocks so far. Episode one has the really great trailer for Soul Plane Two: The Blackjacking.
Huey: "I don't ever want to go to the movies with you again. Not after what happened last time."
Grandpa: "What happened last time?"
Huey: "We got arrested. And shot at!"
Grandpa: "Ah, racism."
Now, that's good stuff. However, it gets followed up with this gem from Grandpa, "Stereotype? In Soul Plane? That's nonsense."

If you've never seen Soul Plane, shame on you, and check this out.

In episode two Tom and Sarah are set to break up because Tom thinks that Usher is moving in on Sarah. Funniest lines in episode two are:

Riley: "I don't know the non-curse way to say he got 'bitched.'"
Huey: "Humiliated, castrated, emasculated . . ."

Episode three has a white character for whom Samuel L. Jackson does the voice. He even talks like the character Jackson played in Pulp Fiction. Anyway, the entire episode is on the Stop Snitchin' theme. Says Grandpa to Riley, "I'm gonna take me a nap, drink me a Red Bull, wake up, and beat you 'til you talk." How's that for gettin' the snitch?

COLUMBUS DAY WEEKEND WRAP

As some of you may know, this Monday was Columbus Day, or as they call it in Canada, "Thanksgiving." It was quite a weekend.

First, screw Wisconsin. Yeah, I said it. Sure, the Cubs crapped out against the Diamondbacks, but before they did that, they pushed the Milwaukee Brewers out of the playoffs. Then on Saturday, the Illini snapped the Wisconsin Badgers' 14-game win streak and beat the 5th ranked Badgers in Champaign. That was beautiful, since the Illini had been suffering a rough decade until this year. On Sunday, the Beloveds ensured that even with the Cub loss it would be a good weekend when they beat the so-called Packers in Green Bay. HA! Screw you, Wisconsin!

Second, the Chicago Marathon was a big mess. It was 88 degrees (!) and humid. A bunch of people ended up in the hospital. One guy died, although the heat was supposedly not an issue in his death. The media here are split. The Sun-Times is demanding an apology from organizers, while at least one Tribune columnist says the runners were stupid. I am not sure. I do know that if running 26.2 miles in 88 degree temperatures seems like a good idea to you, you are a different kind of cat than I. Hell, I put off mowing the lawn this weekend.

Third, I just have to mention this. There was a plane crash in Washington state. It appears that most or all of the passengers died. That is too bad. That being said, the passengers were a group of skydivers returning from a skydiving event in Idaho. And they died in a plane crash. Now that's irony.

LET'S TRY AGAIN

Well, the Cubs clinched the N.L. Central, and are off to the playoffs. They start a best-of-five game series against the Arizona Diamondbacks on Wednesday. Will they win? Maybe. I am not really sure. A best-of-five series can go either way, and the Diamondbacks are as flawed (if not more) than the Cubs. We'll see. The Cardinals won a World Series with 83 wins last year, so we'll see. The next team to win 13 games will be the World Series winners. Why not us?

Anyway, it is good to know that U can start the roller coaster ride of Cub fandom before he has teeth. It lasts a lifetime, and in his case, he is starting nice and early. As you can see, he is stunned that they went from Dusty's 2006 collection of dogs to a playoff team after only increasing payroll by about $30 million.

By the way, the Tribune did this half-assed "99 Things Every Cub Fan Should Know." Yes, they should.