SILVER AND BLACK ATTACK
Police in Las Vegas have issued a felony warrant for Mr. Cole Murdoch Ford. Some of you might remember Mr. Ford as a place kicker for the Raiders in the late 1990s. Having a Raider up for a felony is hardly news, but this idiot is the guy they believe pulled the drive-by on Siegfried and Roy’s house.
I shudder to think what their beef might have been. Personally, I try not to get into conflicts with animal trainers from Germany who are partial to sequins and cod pieces. That may just be me though.
THE ARNIE AMENDMENT
Proving again that no good has come from California since we snatched it from Mexico, it appears that the United States Senate is falling all over itself to alter the United States Constitution to allow Arnie Blackploughman to be President of the United States. This makes sense, since we have some much trouble finding people who are willing to be President and meet those oh so stringent requirements.
As a refresher, to be President, Article II of the Constitution requires that a person (a) be a natural born citizen of the United States, (b) be 35 years old; and (c) have been resident in the United States for fourteen years. That’s it. There is no requirement that you be a white male who attended Ivy League schools, that you have a funny accent, or that you be wealthy. However, it appears that these requirements constitute one too many requirements for Herr Blackploughman to be President. Thus, Joint Resolution 59 (HJ Res 59, first session, 108th Congress) seeks amend the Constitution to allow a person who has been a citizen for at least 35 years to be President. Joint Resolutions 67 (HJ Res. 67, first session, 108th Congress) and 104 (HJ Res. 104, second session, 108th Congress) both seek to amend the Constitution to allow a person who has been a citizen for 20 years to be President. Finally, Don Nickles obviously misread the memo, since S. 2128 (second session, 108th Congress) seeks to define “natural born citizen” as:
(1) any person born in the United States and subject to the jurisdiction thereof; and
(2) any person born outside the United States--
(A) who derives citizenship at birth from a United States citizen parent
or parents pursuant to an Act of Congress; or
(B) who is adopted by 18 years of age by a United States citizen parent or
parents who are otherwise eligible to transmit citizenship to a biological
child pursuant to an Act of Congress
This has the advantage of not requiring a Constitutional amendment, but does not help der Lieber Herr, since he would not be a natural born citizen under this definition.
It is hard to link to pending bills on the Senate page, since their status changes, but with the resolution or bill numbers you can check on their progress here. Pray for Arnie. Caleeforneea is too small for a man of his vision, and no bad has ever come of a country letting an Austrian run their affairs, right?
Police in Las Vegas have issued a felony warrant for Mr. Cole Murdoch Ford. Some of you might remember Mr. Ford as a place kicker for the Raiders in the late 1990s. Having a Raider up for a felony is hardly news, but this idiot is the guy they believe pulled the drive-by on Siegfried and Roy’s house.
I shudder to think what their beef might have been. Personally, I try not to get into conflicts with animal trainers from Germany who are partial to sequins and cod pieces. That may just be me though.
THE ARNIE AMENDMENT
Proving again that no good has come from California since we snatched it from Mexico, it appears that the United States Senate is falling all over itself to alter the United States Constitution to allow Arnie Blackploughman to be President of the United States. This makes sense, since we have some much trouble finding people who are willing to be President and meet those oh so stringent requirements.
As a refresher, to be President, Article II of the Constitution requires that a person (a) be a natural born citizen of the United States, (b) be 35 years old; and (c) have been resident in the United States for fourteen years. That’s it. There is no requirement that you be a white male who attended Ivy League schools, that you have a funny accent, or that you be wealthy. However, it appears that these requirements constitute one too many requirements for Herr Blackploughman to be President. Thus, Joint Resolution 59 (HJ Res 59, first session, 108th Congress) seeks amend the Constitution to allow a person who has been a citizen for at least 35 years to be President. Joint Resolutions 67 (HJ Res. 67, first session, 108th Congress) and 104 (HJ Res. 104, second session, 108th Congress) both seek to amend the Constitution to allow a person who has been a citizen for 20 years to be President. Finally, Don Nickles obviously misread the memo, since S. 2128 (second session, 108th Congress) seeks to define “natural born citizen” as:
(1) any person born in the United States and subject to the jurisdiction thereof; and
(2) any person born outside the United States--
(A) who derives citizenship at birth from a United States citizen parent
or parents pursuant to an Act of Congress; or
(B) who is adopted by 18 years of age by a United States citizen parent or
parents who are otherwise eligible to transmit citizenship to a biological
child pursuant to an Act of Congress
This has the advantage of not requiring a Constitutional amendment, but does not help der Lieber Herr, since he would not be a natural born citizen under this definition.
It is hard to link to pending bills on the Senate page, since their status changes, but with the resolution or bill numbers you can check on their progress here. Pray for Arnie. Caleeforneea is too small for a man of his vision, and no bad has ever come of a country letting an Austrian run their affairs, right?
posted by David at 1:15 PM
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